The premise of this post is simple: Match a numbered comment below with the Cat you consider made that comment.
i.e. 21. I am superior to youse all! Muddy.
Or just: 21. Muddy.
I will reveal the authors, along with the exact date and time the comment was made.
The numbers are not rankings, but for ease of reference.
All comments are direct quotes, sans the usual markings.
If you recognise your comment, please refrain from ‘outing’ yourself.
While the primary purpose is to entertain, and acknowledge the wisdom and humour many Cats bless us with, perhaps we can also reflect on the power of removing a comment from its context, whereby a new meaning can be implied?
1. I am so god like I sometimes make myself incontinent.
2. Crotchless, a word of advice: ease up on the meth; you’ve been posting like a headless chicken with .410 pellets up its arse.
3. You are worse than a fart in a lift going to the 50th floor.
4. … and I know couples who have bonded over farts.
5. Go and bang your head on the floor, until you are forgiven.
6. I self-identify as an octopus and I am offended by your language.
7. If those palaeolithic Venus figurines had had mouths and a finger to stick into their throat they would be dead ringers.
8. The Greens: standing out and proud in a field of glistening turds.
9. That should cover it – with a pillow. Until it stops breathing.
10. The hyphenated barrel stuffers lose to the dental denialists by one point.
11. Would it be immoral to have a shag with an alien?
12. Your head. Dead bears bum. Some assembly required.
13. If any of my comments contained facts, I apologise.
14. I really regret not signing up to their disloyalty program. I would be able to get a better quality set of tooth pliers and a more reliable battery to have wired to my testicles.
15. One of my parentheses just got shot off.
16. The meja is evil. Filled with poisonous imbeciles with zero accomplishments.
17. [R]ainbow barbed-wire.
18. Morrison can go shove his cock in a pickle slicer for his “you don’t need to take a vaccine” bullshit.
19. Yes, my devoted worshipper?
20. … the Liberal Party is just a blocking force determined to stop any meaningful conservative voice into the political arena.